Friday, October 13, 2006

Baby names

People can obviously not be trusted to make decisions on their own. Thats the only reason I can think of that Crocs are so popular. Because, are you gardening people? Are you working in a hospital? Are you in fact Mario Batali? No. You are not. So why in the hell would you think that these are a good fashion choice? It is becase you are obviously blind. And also because someone told you they were 'cool' and you completely lack the capacity to form an independent opinion about it. I hate to break it to you folks, you look like idiots. This could be even more idiotic than the recent 'bohemian skirt' craze which made everyone look like they had HUGE ASSES.

With the baby anticipated in 9 weeks (NINE WEEKS OMG!), we spend a lot of time thinking of names. Rather, I spend a lot of time thinking of names, and then I present my shortlist to Brian. We're down to two by the way, and no I'm not going to tell you what they are. Anyhow. You would not believe how many websites are devoted to baby names, the discussion of proposed baby names, baby name meanings, etc. A lot. A lot of websites. Usually when I read these websites I become concerned about the future of the planet, because this generation of kids is going to have some totally messed up names. First of all, no one can spell a name in any normal way. Second, no one can pick a normal name, period. As a result, we're going to end up with a whole generation of people with "Wal-Mart names" spelled in unpronounceable ways (Seriously, one discussion I read this morning concerned someone who wanted to name their boy 'Lyric' (gag) but then decided to go with 'Lyre' instead, pronouced 'Leer' which a) isn't the way you pronounce 'lyre' and b) why would you want your child to be named Leer?).

I found this website that commented on a bunch of these baby name polls, and its hilarous.

A discussion of baby names would be incomplete without mentioning my friend S who wants to have a daughter named 'Pita'. Only if she names her next child 'Hummus', I think.

4 comments:

Annie said...

So I spent Thanksgiving at my in-laws two years ago ranting about names that are entirely made of Y's, like Mykynzy. And what happens? My cousin-in-law gets herself knocked up and names the baby, yes you guessed it, Mykayla. Guess that means I can never go THERE again, oh shoot. :)

Anonymous said...

Good call on the Crocs.

I first saw Crocs (they were called something else) a couple of years ago while I was on the Appalachian Trail. They made for light camp shoes. The funny thing is that everyone agreed that they were extremely dorky but Appalachian Trail folks tend to be pretty utility-oriented and less likely to worry about social norms(dressing, bathing, etc. ;)). The other funny thing is that they haven't changed at all as far as I can tell and back then they were only like $3 a pair!

Pretty sure that Crocs are going to end up being featured on "What were they thinking?" VH1 type shows in about 10 years like they currently talk about leg warmers, big hair, parachute pants, etc.

Glad I had the good sense, even as an AT hiker, to miss out on that fad.

I have to say that one of my favorite travel memories does revolve around a pair of Crocs though...a buddy of mine in full American tourist outfit (ball cap, random T, plaid boxers) and *bright* baby blue Crocs, with socks no less, asking a Honduran bus driver, in severely broken Spanish, how to get to the, um, red light district shall we say. He wasn't serious but he had the situation pegged because he wasn't going to have any luck at the bars that night in that get-up. Ha ha! :D Good times. Good times.

Anonymous said...

One other thing to keep in mind when naming the wee one, besides nicknames and initials, is the company assigned email. Some can get funny. My company has the first initial last name, which was unfortunate for my boss: P. Ison. They made her use her middle initial, too. I once got a fax from a woman whose name was Eboni, which made me wonder (in a totally racist going to hell kind of way) if there is someone else out there named Whiti. Good luck with the naming!

peppersnaps said...

crocs are horrific! I'm always floored when I see them on otherwise-normal looking people.